Welcome to my blog. I’ve entitled this one: It’s Worth It Because You “Are.” The title comes from the name of my company, “It’s Worth It Educational Consulting,” which I founded with my husband in 1999. My goal then, as now, is to help people accomplish their dreams through education and personal investment. One of my mottos is “Dream Big” because it takes the same energy to dream big as it does to dream small. The other is that “With God, all things are possible” (Matthew 19:26).
My hope is that you will find in the experiences and lessons that I’ve learned on my life’s journey something that will inspire you to pursue all that you are capable of and all that God has for you. It’s taken me a lifetime to understand that I am worth it simply because I am — I exist, I’m not a mistake. I am the image and the likeness of God, therefore, I am worthy to experience all of the good that God has for me in this world.
As you noticed, I am a Christian – I make no apologies for this — it just “is.” Without my faith, I know that I would not have survived to become the person who can share my heart with you through this blog. Let me explain….
In 1980, I was in a terrible place emotionally and spiritually. I had just come out of a physically abusive relationship only to go into a marriage at the age of 20 during my sophomore year of college (no, I was not pregnant) that was psychologically abusive. Within 6 months of the marriage, I found myself sleepless and depressed. I contemplated suicide: I was going to walk in front of a bus on a busy street. People would have thought that it was an accident, but I would have known that it was intentional. The only thing that stopped me were my mother’s words that she shared with me years before: If you commit suicide, you go straight to hell with no possibility of parole! So, I figured that I didn’t want to go there, even though I wasn’t particularly religious or spiritual, but it didn’t sound like a place that I wanted to spend eternity. At that time, I had separated from my husband and had returned to school to complete my junior year of college and was living in a dorm. Once I realized that God would know that it was suicide, I walked back to my dorm and told one of my roommates what I was contemplating and how I had to figure out how to do it without God knowing it was suicide!
My roommate walked me to the counseling office – thank God! It was during those sessions, I learned how much stuff I had buried deep inside of me. Feelings of rejection, loss, unworthiness, anxiety, fear – you name it, I felt it! It took almost four years of therapy to understand much of what happened to me and how my decisions – good or bad – stemmed from those hidden thoughts that many of us are unaware of because of what we saw, heard or experienced while young.
This blog is my way of sharing what I’ve learned to make your journey, hopefully, easier. I’ve been blessed to achieve a great deal in my life with God’s help: I left my first marriage and found my soul mate in the process, who became my husband. Robert is his name. We will celebrate our 27th year of marriage in November. We have raised two incredibly gifted girls – Robin and Jennifer – who are the loves of our lives and make us proud to be parents. We also have the most beautiful and brilliant grandchildren in Shanum and Yahya, who have added more to our lives than I can possibly say. I also have earned three degrees: B.A. in medical anthropology; M.A. in psychological anthropology and a Ph.D. in psychological anthropology with an emphasis in educational anthropology. And if all of this wasn’t enough, God allowed me to become a Vice President at one of the most recognizable museums in the world! Now, how’s that for bouncing back!!
I believe that it is now my time to share what I have learned along the way – the ups and downs – so that you, too, will know that there is life after hardship and heartache, even suicidal thoughts. Life is so worth living because you “are!”
So, if you’re ready, let’s take this trip together!