I’m in the Room

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I recently spoke to my cousin, who is pursuing her Doctorate in Pharmacology, about an experience I had a few years ago while participating in a leadership program in Cleveland, Ohio, my home town.

The exercise was part of the diversity module in the program. The instructor had all of the participants line up with our backs against a wall facing another wall. She indicated that she would make certain statements; if they applied to us, we were to step forward as many steps as she indicated for that particular statement. For example , if you graduated high school, you stepped forward once; if college, you took two steps forward. With the rules understood, we all began our march toward the opposite wall.

I was able to take about seven steps before my forward progress was halted because much of what she said did not apply to me. So, with each statement, the gap between me and others in the room widened. In fact, there were four of us closer to the original wall than we were to the opposite wall.

I have to admit that it was very humbling to realize the slow start in life I had compared to so many other people in the program. I literally had to shake off feeling “less than” or inferior to my colleagues. I thank God that in that moment of perceived humiliation, He quickly whispered to me, “But, you’re in the room!”

“I’m in the room! I’m in the room!, ” I yelled in my head. So, it didn’t matter that I didn’t have all of the opportunities that my colleagues had, I still made it to the same program at the same time they did! Wow, what an epiphany: God can place me wherever He wants, whenever He wants and I don’t have to have the same pedigree as everyone else in order to get there! All I have to do is show up and He’ll do the rest! Talk about reframing an experience! It was life changing!

The exercise really helped me understand that, when God has a plan for you, the “facts” don’t matter. What does matter is whether you’re willing to trust Him for the outcome by doing your part: in order to be selected for the leadership program, I had to complete the application and submit recommendations. I was not selected the first time I applied, and I vowed that I wouldn’t apply again. However, the next year, my boss insisted that I reapply. So, had I not followed through, I wouldn’t have been in the program to have that revelation.

This reminds me of one of my favorite “Successories” posters. The poster is of a basketball court. The ball is on the ground with a spotlight on it and the basketball rim with the caption, “You Will Miss 100% Of The Shots You Don’t Take!” I believe that The Lord requires that we take the shot with preparation (e.g., you should know what a ball and hoop are and the dynamics of shooting, etc.) while trusting that God will allow you to make the shot at the appropriate time and place to accomplish His will in your life.

Back to the “room” narrative…six months ago, my husband and I were sitting in a small stately room on the University of Cambridge campus in England to witness our youngest daughter’s graduation with a Masters of Philosphy degree in Latin American Studies. The event was very regal. There were approximately 400 people in the building and we were not allowed to speak or take pictures throughout the ceremony. We witnessed traditions that were centuries old, and all I could think of was how privileged I was: me, who was raised by a hard working mom in a low-income family; abused by a boyfriend, married and divorced in my early 20s, former suicide risk; who started my life over too many times to count, was sitting in England watching my child graduate from Cambridge! It hit me like a ton of bricks: God placed me “in the room” again!

So, in those moments when you compare yourself to your colleagues or others and feel like you don’t measure up for whatever reason, just remember that your credentials and experiences are only part of the equation; God owns the room and He chooses who occupies it!

17 thoughts on “I’m in the Room”

  2. I’m a mess over here after reading this…thank you for letting God use you…a true blessing. Love you much!

  3. Thank you! I really needed to read that and appreciate you for being a willing vessel. It means so much to be able to thank one of the greatest women I’ve had the privilege to know for everything she did to support me during my undergraduate career. I love you Jackie Chisholm!

  4. Thank you for this. I have a experienced the same feelings when I was invited in the room. Congrats to you on your daughter’s accomplishments. You have done something right, obviously.

  5. I LOVE THIS!!!! “I’m in the Room”. Thank you for sharing. This was right on time. I appreciate you Dr. Jackie Chisholm You are an amazing woman and I’m grateful that God placed you in my life during my days at CWRU.

    Congratulations to you and your family. I’ve been following the posts about your daughter. How awesome is she! Continued blessings to all of you…

  6. Dr. Jackie, Thank you for your inspiration and example you provide for everyone that knows you. Thank you for being in my life and being not only a peer but a friend. Each time we meet, no matter the environment, you are the same person and that speaks volumes to me. Your words resonate with me because I find people everywhere I speak, including myself, always have the “little voice” that says, “Your not enough”, “You aren’t on their level”, or “You’re not doing enough”. I’ve had to learn to “just BE”. I am a “Human Being” not a Human Doing. I love your spiritual connection as I have accepted a call to minister to the Body of Christ as well. Again, thank you for who you are and who you represent always with integrity. Thank you for sharing your story.

    • Ilinda,

      Please forgive me for not responding to this beautiful post several months ago! I’m still relatively new to Word Press, so I didn’t see it in my back office.
      Thank you, thank you, thank you for such a wonderful message. It humbles me to know that the insights God has given me have had such an impact. Thanks, too, for being a friend as well. You continue to inspire me through your words and your life! Blessings!

  7. I too, remember this exercise. I actually do this exercise in my own trainings. It is a powerful reminder that what others count as privilege could just be a set of circumstances for me. and vice versa. the way our society defines having arrived does not apply to me. i can arrive anytime
    God says I can!

    • Simmie,

      Please forgive my delay in responding to your comments of January. I am still relatively new to Word Press and didn’t realize that there were messages for me.

      Thank you so much for your comments. I really appreciate them!

  8. There are times when we need encouragement and cant find it words, friends, or we don’t hear it directly through our prayers immediately. But this just answered one for me. In other phrases or words I have used this premise to encourage other people, but during the past few months for myself I haven’t found much solace in the same advice I find myself giving. Thank you for reminding me “I’m in the Room”, if I am present, prepared, and placing my trust in God, those are the only “qualifications” I need.

    Looking forward to reading more of your blog. Have a wonderful and blessed day.

  9. Wow I don’t even know why or what prompted me to come to this page. But I needed to read this. I am embarking on a new journey in my life and was feeling out of sorts about starting over in a new position. Proudly pushing forward

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